Life can get challenging, no doubt about it. If you're experiencing significant distress and hardship right now then my heart goes out to you. On a visit to Nepal many years ago I saw a family living under a piece of cloth near a river. The woman was smashing up rocks with a hammer and sorting them into smaller pieces. Her young kids were helping her. She was smiling. It was clearly a very tough existence, much tougher than I have ever experienced. If you're not in a really sad situation, then here's a challenge to you. When someone asks you how you are, don't choose "not too bad". "Not too bad" adds no value to the start of a conversation, it's a suckers choice. It's dragging the conversation down, right at the start. It's time to dial up an optimised answer. For the next 10 days answer this way: <ol><li>Honestly - if you're sad or exhausted, stressed, frustrated, tell people. And, if you're OK...</li><li>Go big, optimistic, positive. Go with "pumped", "excited", "fully engaged" or take a leap with "Exceptional".</li></ol> This simple hack will change your life. If you're a "not too bad" person then you'll see a shift straight away. Watch as the energy changes in the person you're meeting with. Notice how your conversations turn more positive and solution focused. Go 'exceptional' and you won't go back.

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Mind

Give up being 'not too bad'

The power of words

<h1>How to be a modern man</h1> We live in challenging times for gender identity. When I grew up there was a clear code for how men should behave. Separate social rules for men and women. There was a strong narrative around being a man. The term "Go on, be a man" didn't carry a question mark. Gender roles in life were clear. It was simple but not easy. It didn't cater for different interpretations of being a man, or for those who were questioning their identity as a man. It had no place for softness, weakness, vulnerability. Today, we live in times of greater choice, greater freedom, a definite relaxing on the virtues of manhood. Perhaps for many however a feeling of confusion, uncertainty, disbelief, disconnect and discontent. Change is hard and especially so when it challenges such ingrained, trained beliefs from our earliest years. Well, rather than dwell on it, as a 52 year old, white, middle class, male, I thought I'd put down my reflections on what I think it important in being a man in modern life. <h3>My top tips for being a modern man. </h3>(Please add your tips in the comments down the bottom). 1. Graciously accept changing social norms while remaining true to who you are, your values and standards, for you, not others. You can open the door for someone out of respect, it's their choice to appreciate it. 2. Train your mind. Flip the focus from physical strength to mental fitness. A modern man spends a lot of time working their brain, absorbing and interpreting information. Mental fitness is critical to thrive in modern life. 4. Honour your ancestors sacrifices by not being a slave to the system. Don't get sucked into marketing. Play your own game, not someone else's. Do your research, make choices for YOUR mind and body that are in your best interest. Make conscious choices for a healthier, happier life. 8. Lend a hand. Our male ancestors were providers and protectors of families, mates and communities. Give back to others, help, support, defend those in need. 6. Show kindness and compassion. In a selfish world, this is the only way to have peace in our lives. 2. Challenge yourself. You are worth far more than the easy path has to offer. You are capable of amazing things, push yourself, explore the limits of your capability. 3. Stop a while. Breathe. Look around. Smell. Taste. Feel. Hear. A rich life is one where your senses fully engage with your surroundings. Reconnect your senses, all of them. Experience life through all five senses and you'll have much greater richness in everything you do. 9. Connect with nature. For 300,000+ years your ancestors were born into nature, grew up in nature, matured in, studied, reproduced in, lived, thrived and died in nature. Get outdoors. Embrace the natural elements. Wind down your windows, breathe it in, smell it, feel it, taste it. Look after it. 11. Move more. A modern man recognises that his body works better when it moves, just as our ancestors did. Move in as many ways as you can. Free up your joints, your muscles, your limbs, your organs, move more. 21. Don't expect order. Life changes quickly, it doesn't care for your structured plan, your sequenced events, your perfect pattern of things. Embrace chaos, uncertainty, irregularity. Train your mind and body, it will cope with whatever life throws at it, just as your ancestors have done. 13. Embrace. Adapt. Let go. Move on. Don't dwell on the past for you can't change it anymore than your ancestors could. 14 Love someone or something. Don't hold back, don't be scared, don't push people away through fear of being hurt. Have courage. Throw yourself into love, boots and all. It doesn't need to be romantic love, it just needs to be that unconditional care and concern for someone else. Chose the right person and what you give, you will receive. You may get it wrong and be with the wrong person. If so, move on quickly. If not, dig in. Embrace it. Let go of fear. Cherish it, for it, like everything in life, will not last forever. Love for today. Be strong, be true to yourself, build confidence in self and others. Live with kindness and compassion for all living things. While the world may feel uncertain right now, the only thing we can do is be our best. Some days that's easy and some days that's hard. We will succeed and fail in equal measure and it's the contrast between the two that gives life meaning. We should strive for success but be mindful and deliberate about our understanding of what success is. For me success changed over the years. From an early quest for adventure when I was younger, to money and status, family, security in my 30's and 40's to more social change and meaning now. Who knows what the next decade will bring for me and for you. I wish you only the very best. Remember that whatever is behind you does not define who you are and who you will be. Aim to be the best version of yourself and life a meaningful life. Go well. TroyWellteam Founder.

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Modern life is tough, confusing and ever-changing. Here's my tips to how to be a modern man. 

Embracing manhood in modern life

HOW TO BE A MAN

Sometimes you just have to let go. Insights by Troy Flower - Wellteam Founder and CEO. For most of my life I've been a highly driven person, but this year has been tough.&nbsp; I'd write goals every year on January 1st. I'd pursue them with full force and a belief that they must be achieved for me to be successful.&nbsp; House, promotion, money, car, business, kids, holidays, relationships, mountain bike championships, running times.&nbsp; Here's the thing though. Most of those things can be changed in a heartbeat. None of them are permanent and the only meaning and value they have is what I attach to them.&nbsp; They are adjustable, infinitely adjustable.&nbsp; This year's been tough. I got hit by a car in February while riding my bike. The accident left me with damaged knees, a broken wrist and far too much inactivity for my liking.&nbsp; I was lucky really. It could have been much worse.&nbsp; As for my trip back to Nepal, annual running and mountain bike racing objectives... they've had to drop away, perhaps permanently from a running perspective.&nbsp; While we can hold on tightly to these aspirations/goals/objectives we have to let them go when winds are not in our favour.&nbsp; I've taken to calling my goals "waypoints". I really like the analogy of a waypoint from a sailing perspective.&nbsp; A waypoint is something you sail past, it's not a permanent state or destination. It's just a guide as to where you're going.&nbsp; You can sail close to a waypoint, it could be a port, harbour or village and sometimes it's a lighthouse.&nbsp; Waypoints are guides that give you a sense of direction and purpose, but they are not the end-point. They are flexible.&nbsp; If the winds are not in your favour, you simply adjust your sails and move on to the next waypoint.&nbsp; If a waypoint is missed on the first pass, you can always loop back when the winds are more favourable.&nbsp; Nothing in life is permanent and we're in a constant state of change, adaptation and readjustment.&nbsp; My year so far has taught me to adjust my sails, read the winds and rather than expend my energy fighting into a headwind, beating myself up for lack of progress, I'm just taking the breeze over my shoulder.&nbsp; Life is amazing.&nbsp; It should always be a challenge, just not a fight.&nbsp; If the winds are not in your favour, adjust your course, hoist up the mainsail and move on to another waypoint. Use the prevailing conditions to your advantage.&nbsp; Nothing in life is permanent. The winds will change, conditions will change. There will be storms, calm seas and beautiful harbours to spend some time in.&nbsp; You have only one life. Life it fully.&nbsp;

How tightly should you hold onto your goals? Try a different approach. Go with waypoints instead. 

A pragmatic approach to achieving what you want in life.

DITCH YOUR GOALS. USE WAYPOINTS INSTEAD

<h1>Unless you live in a blanket box at the end of your parents bed, you’ll be feeling the impact of changes around you.&nbsp;</h1> Whether it’s climate shifts, finance model shifts, global sharemarket disruptions, global power imbalances, destabilised, populist politics, de-centralisation of workforces or just the cost of daily life… things are changing.&nbsp; I can’t explain why, I can’t predict where it’s heading or any timeframe for reestablished equilibrium… if ever. I’ll bet you can’t either. Even the worlds best economists can only reliably predict the past.&nbsp; Change can be scary, likely impacting most of us today with so many variables changing at once.&nbsp; Rather than distracting ourselves by doom scrolling on phones or binge-watching the box… it’s time to re-wire our minds and bodies for the task ahead.&nbsp; Rather than basking in luxury or seeking the easy, comfortable life, it's time to re-orient our mental models.&nbsp; <h2>It’s time to join the expedition.&nbsp;</h2> Think back upon early explorers across the world. Did they know what they were heading into? Do they know what to expect? No. Did they encounter hardships? Did they have no choice but to struggle through? Was it easy, smooth sailing?&nbsp; Were they tough, resilient, adaptable?&nbsp; Did they train and prepare for what they might encounter? You bet they did.&nbsp; What do the next 10 years look like for you? Will it be smooth sailing or is there a storm brewing? I hope for you there's one hell of an adventure ahead... a true expedition of the ages. Something that will ignite your senses and tap into 200,000 years of evolutionary biology, the same biology that links you with all those early explorers. Navigate the next 10 years in great mental and physical shape and you'll be a legend too. <h1>Here's how to prepare... come what may:&nbsp;</h1> <h2>Prepare your mind to accept, not resist change. </h2> When changes is coming, don't expend valuable energy, time and other resources defending your position. If change is coming and the outcome is inevitable, then yield quickly and re-establish a new position early. Resources spent defending the undependable are wasted. Look for signals early that change is coming and be adaptable.&nbsp; <h2>Live below your means. </h2> So many people today use borrowed money to live beyond their means. While this might give you access to more things than you can currently afford, it can place you in significantly increased financial stress when chaos reigns. Adjust early, adjust now, downscale your house, buy the cheapest car your ego can afford, go back to eating basic foods, not luxury items.&nbsp; <h2>Challenge your social needs versus your basic needs. </h2> Social needs are things that satisfy your status in your community. If you’re hanging out with the Mercedes Benz crowd you’ll be buying more expensive wine and eating more expensive cheese. Rebel against this social conformist behaviour and tread your own path or change the crowd you hang with. Transition from the Moet mob to the 5am run club… or Wellteam.&nbsp; <h2>Get uncomfortable to build resilience. </h2> You don’t build resilience by being comfortable. It’s like a muscle. You have to train it. Ironically, the more frequently you train for discomfort, the less discomfort you will experience and the more resilient you will become. Start with cold showers, intermittent fasting, push ups, sit ups, getting up first thing every morning, get outside and do 30 minutes of activity… especially when it’s cold and wet or hot and humid.&nbsp; <h2>Practice life outside your comfort zone. </h2> There’s a thing called Challenge Stress. It works like this: if you deliberately expose yourself to a stressful experience and know it won’t kill you and know you can stop… then it will build mental resilience if you do it. It works well because you can choose it and by choosing it you accept and embrace the discomfort. Enrol in an event or activity that pushes you mentally and physically. Sign on for an open mic night at a pub, an art competition, a 5km run like Park Run, a swim, a race, an event that you may fail at.&nbsp; <h2>Prepare your body to function more efficiently. </h2> Your body is amazing, truly amazing. Your ancestors survived through extreme heat, cold, injuries, famine, plagues and more. Today… we’re soft. We rarely feel hungry, rarely experience symptoms of anything without reaching for drugs. We rely on alcohol to make us happy or relaxed, drugs to calm us down or perk us up. Go natural. Get back to nature, try a 24-36hr water only fast, swim in the middle of winter, turn the air conditioner off in your house, your car, let your bodies natural thermostat work for you, drop caffeine for a week, alcohol, wheat, milk, processed foods. Re-engage with 200,000 years of evolutionary engineering. <h2>Learn and know your limits. </h2> As with all of the above. When we push ourselves we stretch our psychological limits so they closer match our physiological limits. When we do this we build self-confidence. We don’t worry if we miss lunch, if there’s no hot water, if we’re at the beach on a cold day, if we have to run to catch a train, if there’s no milk, bread, cake, coffee, we build mind and body strength.&nbsp; Start training now. Start building your mental and physical resilience.&nbsp; Today, we use a small portion of our available functions. We’ve grown soft, comfortable but your mind and body are incredibly capable. When you're fitter, calmer, have greater clarity over your needs and your purpose, feel stronger in body and mind and surround yourself with others on that quest… then, and only then… are you prepared for the expedition of the next 10 years.&nbsp; There’s a storm coming. You know it. You can feel it too, I know.&nbsp; It’s going to be amazing… because we’ll be prepared.&nbsp; Do the training now.&nbsp; Are you a true modern explorer? Embrace the chaos.&nbsp; NOTE:Wellteam is your perfect training partner and community. Explore over 80 biohacks that tap into your evolutionary biology, they will push you outside your comfort zone, get you back in touch with your capability, build your confidence, get you fitter, calmer, clearer and stronger. You'll be surrounded by others on a quest to thrive amidst the chaos. This is Wellteam. <h2>READY TO BEGIN? </h2> Get your baseline scores and report using the <a href="https://www.wellteam.me/survey" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Wellteam Scorecard Tool</a> then use our AI tool to build a <a href="https://www.wellteam.me/challenges/available" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Custom Challenge Program</a> of micro-challenges built based on your report. When you're ready, join the flagship <a href="https://www.wellteam.me/challenges/available" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Launch Challenge</a>, build camaraderie with others on weekly zooms. Don't just weather the storm... dance to it. ACTION BEATS INTENTION. &nbsp;

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Tough times breed tough people. Easy times breed soft people. With chaos looming, get training now. 

The power of words

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